oh the weather outside is frightful

it is snowing/sleeting outside. i absolutely love it.
yesterday morning, i woke up with a strange feeling. i wasn't feeling sorry for myself.
for the past month, i have had a chip on my shoulder--i kind of felt like i wasn't getting everything that i deserved out of life. i felt like i was lonely, that people were shallow, and that the right people didn't like me in the right ways. i was moderately miserable, and quite surprised to find myself that way. i dreaded talking to people, especially on the phone, because i never felt like it was me talking. i walked around sure of the fact that my emotions were as transparent to everyone else as they were to me. most of all, i felt guilty for feeling all of these things.
and then yesterday morning, when i was half awake, i had an epiphany.

i am blessed.

that's how it started. simply: i am blessed.
and then it went on from there.
i have traveled around the world.
i have gone to three different colleges.
i have worked upwards of 8 different jobs.
i have a family who loves me very much.
i have met the most random people in the most awkward situations, and i have been able to laugh about it not to long after the fact.
i have traveled america in a motor home.
i have owned cats since the age of 11.
i have returned movies to the movie store without hyperventilating.

and through it all, i have never been alone. the very presence of christ is with me. i think i am a much more resilient person than i give myself credit. how can i possibly feel sorry for myself when there is nothing to feel sorry for?
i think i am going to have a ramshackle life.
and i think that i am very excited about it.